Be Humble, Sit Down

Dear Mr. Higher-Being,

    I am writing to you today to apologize for my great blunder during our encounter last week. I truly am ashamed to have not recognized you immediately, for your presence is all one needs to know who you are. Your air of superiority and distinct status should have been immediate triggers to alert my inferior self that you were indeed before me. I should have seen through your disguise. You altered you appearance so perfectly that I was inclined to believe you were just another human like me. The two arms, two legs, eyes, nose, lips... they were all so deceiving. Your vulnerability, your vanity, your greed... they seemed all so familiar. But, as I have realized now, I was oh so dearly mistake. Oh dear lord please forgive me! I’m begging on my knees, I tell you! I should have noticed you callus-free hands; your name brand peacoat; your 24K gold watch; your imported leather shoes. They were all obvious signs that you likely haven’t spent a single day — a single moment — in your life struggling for that extra pocket money. Not even one second of your time has been taken up with breaking a sweat, getting your hands dirty, or following orders. You’ve lived a life care free, with all your wants and needs brought to your side with a wag of your finger. Otherwise, how could you belittle those those who spend everyday of their life running at the beck and call of strangers to rake up a couple quarters to buy them selves a $1 sandwich from the convenience store, or a few crinkled bills to purchase a new pair of socks in replacement of their almost-disintegrating ones. It’s unimaginable for one who has gone through all of this suffering to be unable to sympathize with creatures of their own kind. So, dear sir who is above all but God, I plead of you to forgive my misjudgment; to condone my grave crime to your pride. Allow me to wipe clean my slate and start on a new leaf — one where I throw away all my morals and self-respect and submit my being to you. I’m ready, now, to worship, to obey you, like all the other people you already own, for you are the almighty being, not a human like us.

                                                                                                                     Sincerely,
                                                                                                   Just Your Regular Human Being